1.      The overbearing arrogance of writers is true, just ask us.

2.      If one sits on one's ass all day, in due course one will enlarge one's
        asshole.  This is why writers are classified as Big Assholes.

3.      When the writer announces that he or she has found his or her voice,
you may interpret that to mean:
        a)  _________
        b)  _________
        c)  _________
        d)  _________
        None of the above _________.

4.      Writing is a lot like fucking, but only like it, not it.

5.      I never met a writer I liked, says the writer into the mirror.

6.      Writing is not [we insist] the living repetition of life.
        Moreover, all writing is done [in our opinion] hapharzardly.

7.      Writing is such a burden, especially because of its manual aspect.

Copyright © 1996 Raymond Federman